Melt with you.....

Its heating up in here and I know its not because you walked in.... The sun is burning spots on my heart and in my skin. The air we are breathing is polluting down to our core, the way were treating the planet.... is making mother nature a whore. Someone is raping her sky, pillaging her trees, holding her down to drill, then forcing her to her knees. BEGGING FOR MERCY..... she is crying.... inside she is dying.... and I have to ask, are you even trying?
http://www.blogactionday.org/

Trust No Bitch....

The secret is in the sauce.... or at least "that's what she said" and all that keeps running through my mind is how I should have stayed in bed.
He has a baby, and shes got one on the way, they just got married and I think he proposed yesterday... and then there is my life. The one that has been plotted from day one, somehow all my knots untied and my plots have been undone... I have patience and hope just as much as the next, a bit of pure conviction that leaves most men perplexed. But somehow I feel it already appropriately true... that the only way a man would stick is if I were made of glue. I have to stop acting like only I know because while I might know a real good way, there is a million ways to grow. Its purely my own doing that I am almost too difficult to comprehend but I would have to blame the liars, cheats and ass holes for for my hearts surviving on liquid mend.... Mean mean girl... can't keep her smart ass mouth shut, but at least my condescending self lets you know what is what..... Not feeding you lies... that renders me your queen or just some bitch, just like the thin line between love and hate... you alone can decide which is which....

next or last....

This is the point of no return....and the lessons that I learned will be gathered and used as sutures for the wounds that I have earned.
Because every now and again I am faced with circumstances so far out of my control that I allow myself to resort to childhood with desire to hide in the nearest hole. And as much as I said that "I just want you to be happy"... I wanted you to find that happiness in me... And now its seems we must agree to disagree... Because I know I am not that girl I imagined in my head... I know I could not fulfill all those promises that I said. This selfish little bitch has surfaced and I feel helpless once again, not because I cant control the kid in me but because Im being a shitty friend. I want to say Im so happy, stoked, and overjoyed for all the excitement of your new little boy. So its best if we take a break from sight, a hiatus from your touch, a semi-permanent good bye from " I miss you oh so much".... because your heart is no longer mine to hurt due to lack of care, your tiny little pieces have been swept up and put in the shop for repair.... and this is my I am sorry, for not being a better fit....but I suppose this is best for both, as hard as that is to admit. I want to say I am proud of you, for growing up so fast. And how Im not surprised that you saved the best for last. You were my first real love, and also my first true friend and as much as my pride wants to stomp off, that friendship will never end. Its hard for me to say without feeling a little crazy.... but I can't wait to meet the little lady, and I am so excited about the baby. I simply must say Thank you, for helping me to change my ways... If you hadn't taught me about respect in love, I would be doomed to lonely days.... and fuck if I don't end up the cat lady anyways.... LoL
Thank you Friend....

Again.....

I puked a little in my mouth when I heard the news. And Im not too proud to say I swallow and chase it with some booze. The taste that was left in my mouth, somewhat resembles my mood knowing all that shit you fed me, well... none of that was food!

hearts they are a beatin....

So then it hit me...like a ton of bricks to the head. I have always been in control of this situation I was just never quite aware of what "this" was until now. The self. Me....I.....Within me there is the ability to "make lead, follow or get the hell out of the way" and within every option I have there is a brief moment to prove to myself who I really am. With every choice I am given a little gift from God to either make the most of or make a mess of... so then I leap. My existenz begins.... and my fears fade to black........ I will wait for nothing and fear even less Sine Metu.......

M.I.A.

You left your heart on my pillow just before you kissed me goodnight, and as much as I would love to keep it and hold it close, I have a felling that just isn't right....
I think you might be needing it back in your chest. Time wounds all heals and I think you may need a rest. And as much as I would love to be your blanket to hold close in the night, the pillow you lay your worries on and your soothing voice to tell you every little things gonna be alright. I just can't..
Your story to real, and mirrored to my own.... only the story I didn't write, the one before I was grown. Im so sorry my sweet.... I can't tell you how to handle what your going through, still fearful of walking away from you.
But none the less here you are my dear, I am giving this bloody mess back to do with it what you will. Although I must admit longing for you was quite a thrill......
I refuse be your everything, when you wont even let me know who you are, then every little bit I learn leaves me with a little scar..... Be about you, be about change, be about true be somewhat strange... Remember where your came from, where your going, where you have been, remember to take that new car for a spin. Don't forget whats your priority, remember love is the minority, and that you have authority to make love, break love, hope love, poke love, take love, fake love, peace love..... peace love..... peace love.....until then.... love

Lessons learned, lessons earned, lesson....burned!

If a tree falls and hits my car while I am sleeping will it make a sound? And if it does....will I learn my lesson and not park there again? Or will I hope that the tree trimmers that came out each following morning, might have done a sufficient enough job to leave my new car safe.....Should I have bought tree insurance?

In every moment of our life.... there is a lesson to be learned, a scar to be earned and a way to get burned.... but we have to take the initiative and have our head on the shoulders that God gave us to fully see which way is which.....

Background......My streets are lined with beautiful large pine trees that were obviously not planned very well when the neighborhood was built due to their rather obtrusive nature on the streets, sidewalks and yards now that they are close to full grown.
I returned from vacation about 3 weeks ago and parked my car across the street in front of my neighbor Dennis' house. Now this particular spot used to be where Dennis parked his car because his wife's white Cadillac was parked in the driveway. She even went so far as to buy him a "Dennis Parking Only" novelty sign and nail it to the tree in front of their house... did I mention this sign was the last thing she bought her husband before she died?.... he eventually sold her Cadillac, and began to park his car in the driveway. So the neighbors are again free to park there. Unless you own a white Cadillac like I do. Because then, on two separate nights... EXACTLY 3 weeks apart... at 1:30 in the morning you will be woken up to the information that the tree that marks "Dennis' Parking Only" has dropped a HUGE limb on your car..... And here is the kicker. My car is parked in that exact same spot as I sit here an write today.
So back to the matter at hand... the parallels with this exact situation that LIFE has given me to that of my own life... Now a tree... the SAME tree has fallen on my car on two separate occasions... and unfortunately as it may be, this is how I seem to make decisions and learn in life. I make a mistake, get burned, earn a scar, suffer damage to my car, wish on a star and walk away learning from a far. Because I do it again.... knowing the risk.... just because I hope that this time might be different. And I know its not just me... I know more people than I can count on my hands and toes who are living on the hopes "maybe it wont happen this time", but Einstein said it best.............."Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different result'" Now I have to wonder.... will I learn my lesson before the whole tree falls on me and park my car and my soul somewhere else and if I do that... will a different tree fall and crush me just the same or will I remain safe here with the newly trimmed beast hovering over me...Is this the trees coming for me to seek revenge for their smaller hemp sisters? Does this parallel my relationships? Is a ghost dropping limbs on my car? Does any of this mean anything??? To be continued.

Foreva.....

Loving you, is the most healthy and unhealthy thing I manage to do. I try to remember what it was about you that I believe is still true.... And then I instantly become blue. Everything but me....... And I know I will never stop loving you... But Why? There isn't a reason to lead me to believe, that for just one second I should wish I didn't leave... But then there are those dreams, and the constant inner fights. That leave me sitting up wondering, what your doing tonight. Sometimes I send a text... still know that number off the top of my head, and when I don't hear back from you I remember the last thing you said. But some how I still want to knock on your door, and ask you what for, or if helping me through it would have been such a chore....just once more. Make love, fight until I cry, remember that with or without you I have nothing left to hide.... What if I lost...my one chance at happily ever after, all because I was too scared to put down my wall and let in a bit of laughter.... Too serious Nichole. Your always too damn serious.
But since Ive gone on...I fell like I lost that heavy weight on my heart, and now it seems I'm not such an emotional shopping cart. I now know who I really am, how much I can handle, and what I need from a man. I owe that to you and our loves inner war, If you ever decide that you want to be my friend, My heart is your open door..... xo

man of my dreams....

There was this dream I had, and I do believe it was you.... that kicked down the walls in my heart and made everything around me blue.... Thanks to you....no, thanks to me.
I can see how superficial my old intentions must have seemed.... and as much as I explain, rotten is how it will be deemed.... this I know...kinda blows....
I lied, I cheated, I think I may have stole, more than I could ever repair to again make this existence whole.....Im sorry....so sorry....
Learning every day, how to treat you right, still knowing it doesn't matter much because all I can gain is insight....no more fights...truth in the light. I was wrong.
All of you.
This is for the Irish love that I left at wayside, knowing damn well I the universe wanted our worlds to collide.... you ever coming back?
And the man who I knew I never should have dated.... he wasn't stable enough and had to be sedated....I was ignorant enough to have waited.
The boy with the green thumb, for his marry jane and his money.... never should have followed you... but I decided that Id make a better dummy....cant believe I still loved you
The boy with the bug, and the ex-wifey to match.... I wish I were older then, I might have seen you as a catch....to little too late.
The nicest guy in the world.... love you to this day... there isnt a single bad word of you I could say....wish things could have ended up another way but you deserve better....I get it now.
And a future dream love, waiting for your attention, not to mention the love intervention. Come find me.,,,, I think you see me.
xo

Humbled at Heart....

There I was, sitting alone on the corner or romance and fallacy wondering how I got there and which road I was going to take out of this empathetic existence. The moments and days of resenting lack of success and failed loves were fading and I began to recognize that no matter how hard I try to manipulate a situation if it isn't in the energy of the universe, it isn't worth my energy.

In reality I have always known in my heart..but due to a resistance in my own head and emotional rebellion against the comfortable and went the route of the painful. So now it is just up to me to take the conscious recognition of my addiction to dangerous and unrealistic boys and find a way to embrace comfort..... The endurance my heart has already had to prove to the world existed may not last as long as once predicted and that humbles me. I am begining to understand the beauty is simplicity. Resilience is a gift from the heavens and the ability to appreciate it is a gift from my grandfather and my only hope is to love again unconditionally. Changing ever changing, and begining to understand the blessings given in the simple joys of life rather than the grand gestures. Jah will find you in the details.....

Live and let live....just the same as we live and let die.... LOVE.

I forgot

The perfect moment has yet to come, and so here I am..... Living on two different sides of the window wondering and wishing that it was just a little clearer. With my hand pressed on the cold hard glass on the inside and my feet planted in the dirt on the outside I can not help from feeling a little innocent for the first time in my life....

love and bless

It depends on if you have things.... or they have you.

Letting go is often the strongest thing that a person can do.In life it seems we have an easier time acquiring junk than we do letting it go. We harbor emotional baggage that is difficult to let go of. Most people are not conscious of how much they are carrying and how many of their possessions are no longer adding value to their life.

More often than not it is the struggle to hold onto baggage too heavy for our hearts that causes the damage to our journey we only notice after our flight has left. Now the term "baggage" is used very metaphorically to explain the amount of feelings, issues and problems one continues to hold onto throughout their lives; however, it is also a very literal term in the fact that the the more we pile in, the harder it is to explore. I'm not sure if; it is a psychological norm for women to all want the world to fit into their bag, human nature to be a pack rat (physically and mentally) or if it is just me..... but I do know that no matter how big a bag I get there just isn't room for my issues, tissues and "miss yous" to all be in one place.

From time to time, usually seasonally, I find myself dumping my whole purse onto the floor, scattering the various items that once weighed on my shoulder across the ground. As I examine each piece I ask myself, do I REALLY need to carry this with me everywhere? If the answer is yes I place the chap stick, eye drops, wallet, keys, patience, forgiveness, sympathy, empathy, and love back into my bag and move on to the next piece but if the answer is no, and I do not need to take this specific item with me everywhere, I then ask, if I even need it at all. If so I find an appropriate place to put my nail file, post-its, sharpie, anger, sexuality and competitiveness that is accessible enough to grab whenever I need. And then there is the majority of my load... stuff I dont need or want it... and more than you would think I find myself having to throw away over 1/2 the content of my bag (metaphorically and literally) and wondering what compelled me to hold onto an old band aid, dirty gum, ink less pen, hate, jealousy, and self pity for so long in the first place.

Then I remember....I was afraid I might need it some day and I didn't want to be unprepaired. And I thought that it might just be a fucking FABULOUS idea to lug it around for the rest of my life......burdening myself and those who have to sit and watch me suffer....


But really.... if I was in need of a piece of gum, I would rather have none than chew on a piece that has dirt, crumbs and flakes of weed in it. If I cut myself, would I really want to put an OLD dirty band aid on it? And every time I pick up a new bit of anger or jealousy do I really want to stack it on top of preexisting angst? And the answer is no....

Every now and then, I just have to dump it all out on the floor and start over....lighten to load, cause all the good airlines tax me when I fly by the weight of my bags........ and if I cant foot the bill or leave something behind then it looks like I'll miss my flight.

Sometimes the shortest distance between two points is under construction.....or stained

At a crossroad with a reason, a season and a lifetime.... Standing next to a jacaranda tree. As the wilting purple flowers fall to the ground stain the sidewalk and anything they land on I am left to reflect on the parallels of this tree and some the relationships we make.

Much like the jacaranda tree, when in full bloom, many relationships exude such an awesome beauty we are left with onlookers and admirers indulging in purity and charm, but just the same. as the season changes we are left with stains on our paths and digression in brightness and color. Some seasons run with the cycles of the year, some have reasons involved and some can last a lifetime. Now the question I must answer for myself is if the flowers die and fall to the ground, will I remember how beautiful they once were? Did I take enough time to appreciate the blossoms in bloom or did I wait until they fell to the ground to put on my captain obvious hat and state what and inconvenience cleaning up the aftermath was? And although its true their mess ultimately is somewhat of a nuisance during the end of the season, if I took the time to embrace and indulge in the energy they once produced in their blossoming and purple glory, no matter how fleeting it may have been, the demise would almost always prove worthy. And if I find myself with enough perceptiveness to enjoy and flourish in the reasoned beauty I may never find myself complaining of the difficulty of the end, because all I will be able to think of is the next time I can enjoy the beauty of the season, reason, or lifetime once again.... Until then you wait, and pass by the seemingly dead trees...waiting for the pang of nostalgia when the next passionate harvest of energy will take place. Please and thank you Jacaranda tree, for your beauty, and pain, for the beginning and the end, for the alpha and omega, yin and yang......balance..... xo

(my apologies to anyone who was to park their car under this tree! LBC)

The overwhelming truth....

Why is the reason Im told to stay, the same reason that sent you away? Im just an old fashioned girl, cracking oysters hoping for a pearl.



With my heart on my sleeve and my shirt on the floor
Please watch your step if you walk out that door
Its sad to say but I already let you in this far...
I refuse to sit and just wish on my luck starts.
They can't help me now,
It is way too late
This one will be played out by the hands of fate.
It was just a date... was it just a date....?

Im just a good girl, wanting you to be my good man
Holding on to what I believe, but unsure where to stand
Don't run away...at least not today
All I want is for you to stay....

Stupid fucking country songs
Make me not understand where I went wrong.
"Here comes goodbye", and "he ain't the leavin kind"
Keep playing over in the back of my mind.
Wishin this record was broken like my hope and pride...
Hey, fuck it! I really like you I have nothing at all to hide.
Its easy to be afraid, even easier to run away
But I refuse to let fear run my life and that will started yesterday.
I can take a bit of rejection
I can understand if I'm just not your kind a girl
Please don't just leave me wondering
Say good bye or lets give it another whirl?

Im just a good girl, wanting you to be my good man
Holding on to what I believe, but unsure where to stand
Don't run away...at least not today
Just for me...wont you stay....

When on the ladder of success, don't let boys look up your dress!

Forgiveness is the greatest gift we can give not only to ourselves but to whomever we were harboring our anger toward. When we practice forgiveness we practice to prevent harmful thoughts from causing havoc on our mental well-being and ultimately allow our souls to be set free from the chains of negativity. There are a million ways to perceive forgiveness, some religious, some spiritual, some metaphysical but they all come back to one solid understanding and that is that life without forgiveness is a lonely and unsatisfying road.

Then on the contrary...there is something to be said about forgiveness that goes against everything I try to stand for and believe in. Some people just don't deserve it (including myself)... I mean its not that they never will.... its just that they aren't ready yet. And not because they aren't sorry... only because they don't know how to make it right. But for the self and inner peace, it is just more beneficial to forgive regardless of right. Its not a personal situation, its a circumstantial one. Anyone can become a better person; however, that doesn't mean that things will be better for the circumstance. Continually opening ourselves up to an individual that TIME and TIME burns every bridge we attempt to build no matter how sorry they are.... well that my loveys is called masochism. You can make a BEAUTIFUL meal, but if you shit on it.... no one will eat it! And sorry only works if things are going to be different.
I was never a big fan of hurting physically, I mean the occasional ass slap here and there could tickle my fancy but I never took myself for the type of person who enjoyed pain either mentally, emotionally or physically. So why is it that I continue to allow myself to fall victim to hallow sympathy? I think I am going to change this too... wrong me once shame on you wrong me twice SHAME THE FUCK on me! I have to tell myself.... learn your lesson Nichole, stop setting yourself up for disappointment Nichole. Know that when your instincts tell you something using the soft spot in your heart to make the decision will almost always leave you bummed Nichole! Feel it... really feel it!

Do not make decisions or tell someone "how you feel" out of anger, while drunk or in sympathy, instead chose to make decisions based on rational, love and instinct.

It is foolish for me to become emotionally invested in a person who I know is a volatile person for my growth and development. Its true on both sides of said relationships. I know that no matter how much I want to be a supporting factor in the change of many hearts, I am and will always be a roadblock in the emotional, spiritual, and mental development of some of those very same individuals. For that I am going to be forever sorry. I will work on my judgment, and attempt to ease my cynicism but I will not make myself a martyr, I will not be a victim, I will not be angry. I will not ever ask for anything from you, that I can't give you myself. Love.....



Now religiously Buddhism expresses how negative thoughts and lack of forgiveness can cause for a bad karma and according to Abhayagiri Buddhist Monks "If we haven’t forgiven, we keep creating an identity around our pain, and that is what is reborn. That is what suffers." Christianity understands forgiveness, not as a rule or spiritual duty, but as a form by which the people of God embody their mission to live as a people who are reconciled to God. And contrary to popular belief the Qur'an describes the Muslim believers as those who, "avoid gross sins and vice, and when angered they forgive. (Qur'an 42:37) and says that Although the just requital for an injustice is an equivalent retribution, those who pardon and maintain righteousness are rewarded by GOD. He does not love the unjust. (Qur'an 42:40).

I say hate hurts your heart. Love through the pain, the struggle will reveal your path....

An erection does not count as personal growth!

Change is inevitable, right? There is no person in this world who is the exact same today as they were yesterday and this is the beginning and the end of so many problems. People change and grow together, grow apart, grow a fungus, don't grow fast enough, grew too fast, grow a new limb, don't want to grow, want to grow one way but fail in their direction or get real creative and try make a life out of it...growing that is. But what is the catalyst that sparks conscious maturation? At what point do we as human beings realize that even though nature takes us through the major, physical and biological forms growth and change.... the internal shape is up to the individual.

I have spent a good portion of my life explaining how the circumstances in my world have caused me to end up the way that I am. How, because someone else wasn't doing their part somehow my world wasn't right. The absence of a stable or sober mother gave me an excuse for my flawed social skills, my manufacturing and cheating father gave me an excuse for the lack of patience or trust, and my abusive step mom gave me real reason to hate women and have some intense anger issues... It wasn't until I was left alone in an hallow house with empty dreams and broken promises that I truly realized that the only way I am going to be sure my life ends up the way I want it to .... is if I ACTUALLY want it to enough to make a decision to change and practice some serious follow through. At one point I was actually convinced that I was going to have to change so much that I could make what I was doing at the time work out simply because of my own pride and fear of failure...but running away from something volatile isn't failure it is just and appropriate change, so long as your running in the right direction... I learned then and will continue to work on the transposition of my life into what I believe it should be. Change is possible. But only if you believe.



We are a generation of enablers. It has become a social norm to just say "because of my broken family" or "I never had a Dad" but the reality of the continual cop out we are all saying is "It really doesn't matter that much to me". Because even though it is true, we are shaped from birth on what to eat, how to dress, where do go, what to believe, who to trust, how to tie a shoe and so many more things we are given individual minds for a specific reason, to make individual decisions. Once we come to the realization that our parental figures have embellished the truth to us most of our lifes to scare us into submission of their rules and out of danger, we are then given the freedom of choice. Ignorance is bliss, but the knowledge will set you free! Once we realize that no one person has all the answers and that it is up to us as solo beings in the planet to find the answers that best fits our heart we are truly released from all the burdens we were given as children and harboring as adults....


"We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations." Anias Nin

Amy... Oh Amy

Amy Winehouse: You can't help but wonder what keeps a person locked into the vicious cycle of drug abuse when it is more than just a "loosing game" but has become a public spectacle. Not only was she told by Simon that she needed to "go to rehab", been hospitalized for various reasons (dehydration, overdose, etc.) but now it seems as if she is even giving up. After attempting to perform one of her beautifully written classic style songs "Valarie" at the St. Lucia Jazz Festival she paused for almost a minute and then proceeded to walk off stage leaving backup singers and audience stunned...It is obvious to see that this was a drug induced reaction to something that didn't sit well with her but what will it take for her to see that she isn't the only one walking out...
The authenticity and originality of her style reminds so many of us of those before her, spiraling out of control unsure if they will make it to 28.... and they didn't. Let us all hope that someone, somewhere helps her see that she doesn't want to join the likes of Brian Jones, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison, and Kirk Cobain.... Because style and talent like that is meant to be shared....

Lost Touch?

So I have to ask.... whats next? How much more can we do to achieve a false sense of intimacy while still enabling the complexities of social anxiety? How many medias do we need to communicate without really learning how to communicate? I have to admit, I am at fault...Look at me here, blogging away letting everyone "really know" how I feel but I am a huge fan and advocate of true and honest communication. It is becoming easier by the minute to hide behind a text, an e-mail or an update in our attempts to express ourselves. BUT WHY?
Fear? Pride? Humility? Anxiety? Laziness? Why is it that some of the most intense messages given to me have been conveyed behind script? How is it that some of the most emotionally advanced people I know are allowing the demise intimacy to be conducted through their fingers?
THUMBNATION!
Don't get me wrong, I see the simplicity however I do not think it is in the bste interest of the human condition of insecurities and avoidance to ever text, type or write something out of anger that we would not be willing to say for all the world to hear.
Is this artificial friendship that we are making via false communication going to some day override the old fashioned need for intimacy? Are we going to lose touch so badly that we forget how to?

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has far surpassed our humanity"Albert Einstein

Whats wrong?

Naturally one would assume that it is of great importance to live a life of integrity and interest; unfortunately, it seems to be a greater priority to most of human nature to live a life of power and conquest. So many of us are so caught up in being liked, and not is interested in taking responsibility for the faults in our character or actions. Its not easy, but we all must do it at some point in our lives... accept defeat, concede, throw in the towel and realize that the energy being used to perpetuate negativity is not only detrimental to your self awareness, contentment, dreams and relationships but it also can and will ultimately affect your health. The need to show everyone how much of a monster you see in another only brings out the monster in you. The mirror being used to burn another is a two way and will double as a magnifying glass and ultimately leave the exposer.... exposed and if the sun is shining just right will "catch a fire so they can get burned".
Not Everything that is broken must be fixed and often it is up to us to sweep up the pieces and either recycle or trash the reminiscence.
Honesty, consistancy, and love.....neosporin for the soul

Humble Pie

When I look in the mirror I am not always pleased. Often I find myself picking at my face and any little imperfection that I have...at the end of my facial excavation I look worse than I did in the beginning and now I am going to have scars.... what compels me to continue to worsen an already repugnant situation? The obsession I have to fuck with something if its not the way I think it should be permeates to the rest of my life... and often ruins some of the best parts of my existance. I know its not just me... and I do know that women are more likely to have this tendency over men. At what point are we as individuals willing to accept an imperfection within or without ourselves allow it to exist and rather than put make up over it, cover it with a big sweater or numb it with a bottle of Jameson why has it taken me 23 years to be able to see that humility and love are the only medicines to my internal emotional disease. Inner peace is the only way I will have outer peace... Learning to love the criticisms that are given to me, because people who love me want me to better myself... learning to look in the mirror and point less fingers, knowing that its not what you say its how you say it, accepting that there is always time for an apology and the times when you really don't think you should have to give one, are the times that you most likely should. There isn't a pill, process, person or place that will repair the internal damage I have inflicted upon myself; however, there is hope. Within myself... I have hope and I can be the catalyst of the internal healing.... Today is better than yesterday and tomorrow is going to beat today. Let to love in.